Surgery . . . Dratz!

RIP – The old me.

 

7 ½ hours. 

 

Seven and a half hours on an operating table. 

 

2005.  June.  Miserable, disgusted with myself, angry at so many areas of my life that suffered as a result of my obesity.  The beginning of the end of that life began . . . June 2005.

 

Tri-it-on triathlon was the first.  I began that race in the pool at about 7:30am.  Vulnerable, afraid, and embarrassed by my weight and looks, I stood in line wishing I could blend in until I entered the water.  I weighed 452 pounds when I began training for this race and weighed about 425 pounds on this day.

 

Three and a half years, more than 50 races including mostly triathlons, but also run races and this year a cycling time trial race, I have come to the end of that former me.

 

I am not exactly where I wanted to be on this day, but I am within 20 lbs of it.  I weigh in today at 249 lbs.  I’ve lost more than 200 lbs since I began, but what I have truly gained is the new me. 

 

Many doubted and many more who supported . . . BOTH motivated.

 

I meet people on a regular basis who say they follow this blog and others who tell me of a friend who uses my experiences through this blog.  Being fat sucks and is no fun.  I know there are times where you lose hope and give up or in to your cravings and dependency on food.  Fact is this – I STILL go to food for comfort – I have chosen healthier food and less of it.  There are also times that I have completely fallen off the wagon.  Once you realize you’ve fallen . . . Get back on.  No matter how bad you’ve fallen, ALL IS NOT LOST!!  Just get back on.

 

I am still hard on myself and intimidated in public – especially races, but it is better and I get better with “me” everyday.

 

You Can Do It!  I will help in anyway I can.  I try and return every email sent to me within a reasonable time and I enjoy hearing your stories and your daily obstacles.  But, what I know is – You Can Do It!

 

The old me was a good kind person with VERY low self esteem – This newer me is getting over it!

 

Then there is today . . .

 

Wednesday December 3, 2008 – 08:00 hours

 

I will be under the knife with a highly qualified surgeon who will be performing an upper body lift where he will remove about 15 to 20 pounds of loose skin that has become a mental and physical nuisance. 

 

I am afraid and excited at the same time.

 

That is not the exciting news. 

 

The exciting news is . . . As a result of this surgery I will be able to enjoy a healthy, active, fun life with my NEW BABY!!

 

Amanda is 9 weeks preggo!

 

We are so very happy and I am so very concerned about being a good father.  I have decided to teach my child what not to do through via my experiences!!!!!

 

Please pray for me tomorrow and I will post on Friday – If I am coherent – and let you know how I am doing.

 

Then we will begin the next chapter!